She need Space…

So I gave her space. Maybe she wants to be an astronaut or something 😉 just kidding.

After a long, long tiring day yesterday, I spend a lot of time with my laptop lying my back on bed doing nothing but facebook’s farmville. I’m waiting for her text. Then around 9-9:30pm she finally arrived home. I’m looking for an account in geocities and I remember that she has her yahoo account. I logged in and moving around looking for geocities link I found an email from a male student from her company (she works at university ;)) which I remember that he is the same person I found on her phone exchanging messages not to mention the other one.

Well, she said that he’s just a friend, and I’m fine with that. I ignore them. Last night, i found 2 email messages from him using her e-mail account, I’m curious so I opened it. I’ve seen web cam screen shots sent to her and she’s posing. I wonder when did it happened, she’s not broadcasting any video chat lately anyways. I get pretty mad. I’ve texted her and she said that she didn’t know that he was capturing her. Ok, fine, I don’t get the point maybe I’m just mad. As her boyfriend, the first thing to do is to ask why the heck it was. I don’t know what to say. I wonder who is he and doubt.

Because of this, another thing happens. Earlier on that, she said that she’s going to mall, so what’s the problem with that? Obviously, I don’t have any problem regarding with that malling. Fine, go to mall but just text. Hours and hours past and no message received so I assume that her phone is empty batt . So as I said, she arrived 9-9:30pm. She sent me a message, she tells that she doesn’t have load so she won’t send. Ok, forgiven ganun din naman ako minsan. As I said above, the problem arise and another thing happen. She tells me that she goes to her bestfriends (which is a man) house to visit her mama there. Ok, that’s again fine with me. But the thing is, she did not tell it to me until such problem arise. Maybe she won’t tell it to me if this things didn’t happened. It hurts me so much. Why she’s keeping me a secret? She says sorry. I understand. She tells me to give her a space for the mean time. I gave her. I hope with this period and time, she may found all the answers to her questions. I love her so much and I really do and I will surely miss her.

Maybe I’m not that kind of person that is born to be happy. With all what happened to my family and to my self. I don’t think I’m a lucky person in this freaking world. So world, what’s next? I’m ready! Maybe that’s why I love cameras more than my phone. Because with camera, I can recall and reminisce all the happiest moments that I’ve experience once in my life.

To her, I’m just here waiting. I love you and I will always love you.



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